texas crap

Shirt: LOFT

Pants: Gap

Shoes: Target

Necklace: Banana Republic

Can someone please just answer one question for me? 
When the heck is Texas become worthy of 5 different reality TV shows?


I literally just turned on my TV to watch my normal crap TV line up: jersey crap, new york crap, swamp crap, pawn crap, storage crap .... but now I have to add TEXAS crap to the list. I REALLY DON'T need a TV show (or 5) to show me who is Dallas's most eligible, how Texas beauty queens prepare for a pageant (I lived with a Mississippi pageant queen all through college), or how mothers in the Lone Star state bribe their children with boob jobs to get good grades (my mom is from Texas - no boob job here - she must have been sick on the day they learned that in school) ..... But I'll watch it anyway. 


I'm nothing if not committed to my crap TV line up. Especially crap TV with state names.

Rabbit Rabbit

Shirt: Banana Republic

Jeans: Gap

Headband: Jcrew

Shoes: Tory Burch

Rabbit Rabbit: It's what my college roommate and I race to tell each other on the 1st of every month - the first person to say it has good luck for the month. I lost this month.


I think my taste buds are maturing. I'm scared.


I've gone my entire life hating: 
Olives
Asian food (except I like sushi without raw stuff)
White cream sauce ie: chicken alfredo
Apple pie (yes, for real)
Strawberries
Watermelon
Ginger


Now all of the sudden the stuff I threw temper tantrums and got grounded over in elementary school are kinda starting to taste alright.


urgh. I finally become old enough to move out, grocery shop on my own, and make my own meal decisions and now I decide to quit being a picky eater!?! W.T.F.


I guess my stomach finally caught up with the food budget. CHEAP.

the App. diet

Dress: Target

Shrug: Ann Taylor LOFT

Belt: Banana Republic

Shoes: Payless

What's more annoying than being sick?

Having a sick boyfriend.

What's more annoying that having a sick boyfriend?

Having a sick dog.

Rem Rod is sick. The gross kind of sick: puking, coughing and sneezing sick. 

So what's the real annoying part of having a sick dog? 

Sick dogs don't have insurance to go to the vet. Correction: Remy does not have insurance to go to the vet.

In other news, thanks to BFF's recent visit, John and I are now on a diet. What diet you might ask? "The App Diet" - yes people, you read that correctly. Not only are our phones being used as "Words with Friends Devices" they are now also keeping track of our caloric intake and ruling/ruining my life. 

I found out today was that if I exercise I am able to have more daily calories.

Basically, I walk my dog for wine. 

I walk him twice for 2 glasses.

Thank you iphone.


PS: The blog Freckles in April has made be obsessed with this DIY tunic. I wanna make it... AFTER I locate my creative genes and buy a pair of scissors. all in due time.


For those that have scissors click here are the DIY directions :)

Pictures from Freckles in April

chore chart

 

Dress: Target

Sweater: Target

Belt: Banana Republic

Shoes: Cole Haan

I'm blogging right now as a distraction from cooking dinner. 
URGH I cooked 4 times last week, shouldn't that mean I'm off the hook for at least a month?? Apparently that's not the case and John is not a student of my school of thought. 


In an effort to distract John from being lazy on his morning off, I woke up early (and by early I mean 3 minutes earlier than normal) and wrote up a chore chart. Genius. When I came home from lunch it was as if tiny little Mr. Clean angels had invaded my tiny midget mansion and had worked magic. Shelves that had not been dusted in months had been returned to their original Ikea woodgrain color. Dishes that had taken up residence in my dishwasher, were unloaded, and last but not least, my once broken vacuum was fixed and sucking up carpet crap like it was brand new. 


John may claim to "hate" the chore chart and complain that he's "to old to be told what to do".... but that baby is here to stay. My future children better come out holding Windex and a mop or stay where they are if they know what's good for them. 


I know how to make a chore chart and I'm not afraid to put your name on it.

dog park

Dress: Banana Republic

Sweater: Nordstrom Rack

Shoes: Tory Burch 

My moms dog left the other day and ever since he went back home, Lil Rem just hasn't been the same. Moping around with his head down, sleeping all the time, not being annoying ... If I didn't know any better (or I was a vet) I would say that Mr. Rem has a giant case of doggy depression. Not even the dog park can cure it. believe me. Yesterday I lowered my (not so high) standards, put my big girl panties on went against every moral bone in my body and took Rem to the sneak peak of hell - aka: the dog park. 

It was like walking into the High School cafeteria and your the new kid, and you forgot to wear pants, and you have outrageous acne and you have a retainer head-piece on. It sucked.

Remy on the other hand, loved it. stupid dog.

I love it when out of town work friends come to visit - it's basically the best way ever to make doing nothing look like work. lots and lots and lots of work. yup, that's what happened today - my friend that I met in Vegas on a work trip came to visit me! (yes, I realize that usually people go to Vegas and come back with STDs, lots of money / no money, or with with a husband. I however, came back with a friend). Her visit managed to eat up a whole bunch of my work day and I wouldn't have had it any other way. 

vodka to the maxi

Dress: Target

Belt: Banana Republic

Sweater: Ann Taylor LOFT

Shoes: Target

Just for your information, if you would like to noticed / have a billion people comment on your outfit, wear a maxi dress OR wear "taxi-cab yellow".  I can't put my finger on what exactly makes this (long) number a crowd pleaser but I think it has something to do with the fact that its' not your normal, run of the mill, office attire. which in my book, is a good thing.

I mean, what exactly are you supposed to wear when you meet your new boss? I'm pretty sure something would catch fire if someone were to wear a suit anywhere within 50 feet of our building, a bathing suit was out of the question (the AC is on the fritz) and my full length sequined one-sie didn't seem to convey the "I'm young, professional, laid back, kinda serious" look I was trying to pull off. 

Next best thing: the maxi dress. The same maxi dress I slept in, spilled vodka-soda and ice cream on, and may or may not have worn for 3 consecutive days on a wild Bahamian adventure 2 years ago. ahh...those were  the days of waitress money, day drinking and tropical vacations. It's totally depressing to think that the time of my life consisted of pouring sweet tea, cheap beer, and a uniform - but the money was SO good.

Sorry maxi dress - My closet is now your retirement home, filled with good memories and more importantly all my other fun-time clothes that have just as many stories as you. all involving vodka.

I just wanted to show you the stupid stuff i get to wake up to. daily.